What exactly, may I ask, is so 'express' about expressing milk?
When I take the express lane on a motor way, I arrive at my destination more quickly.
When I go to the express line in the supermarket, I'm back in the carpark sooner, unloading all of my groceries.
So, if one follows this line of thinking, then one would expect that expressing milk would be a quicker and more convenient way to give my bub some grub.
But here, logic fails us. I am writing this blog with the steady hum of the Medela Swing Pump rythmically churning away in the background. It breaks my heart to see one measly drop following another measly drop without any sense of urgency or purpose. Desparingly, I read the measurements on the bottle. Its been 20minutes already and I've collected a sorry 5ml of milk. And how much does a baby need per feed? 100-150ml you say? Dear God, give me strength. And more importantly, give me patience.
Even if we ignore the amount of time it takes to actually withdraw the milk and concentrate on the time it takes to set up the whole process, it is still a lengthy ordeal. I have to wash and sterilise the bottles. I have to plug in all the cords and make sure the contraption is functioning. And I must ensure that I position myself just so in order to get the optimal flow out of my boobs.
If I had countless hours in the day, I wouldn't be fretting but it's not as though I can happily squeeze this milky goodness from myself at any old time. In order to punch in at the milk production factory I must sacrifice my sleep, or the housework, or (gross, but true) having a shower. As a result, I now look forward to expressing my breastmilk about as much as I look forward to Big Brother making a return to prime time TV.
So it turns out I have neither the time, the energy nor the patience to express my breastmilk. There is one lonely bag of milk sitting in my freezer, eagerly awaiting the day that my baby might actually stop refusing to take a bottle so that it can see the light of day again. But bottle refusal is another story, for another time........
All I ask is that we change the descriptor of "expressing" milk when it is so far from actuality.
Instead, I propose we call it: "Slowly-and-laboriously-withdrawing-milk-from-a-Mother's-aching-breast". Far more appropriate, no?
Hi Jess! I can completely relate! I too have the same pump. Every night I have a hot date at 9pm. I express 90ml...it takes about an hour. The worse thing is, is when she takes only a bit by the bottle and you have to sling the rest! Keep heart Jess, just stick on Corrie, the time will go a lot quick. Just don't watch what you're expressing! Big hugs Su Wan x
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